3 Tips For Divorce Mediation

Posted on: 21 June 2016

Many divorcing couples turn to mediation to save money and avoid court. Even if you and your spouse are unable to reach an agreement on all of your issues, mediation can help with some of the issues so that the family court only has to intervene on what is left. If you are heading to mediation, here are some tips to keep in mind. 

Consult With Your Attorney

Before you and your spouse attend mediation, consult with your attorney. He or she can help you determine what is and is not a fair settlement of your issues. He or she can also help you determine just how far you should be willing to go during negotiations. 

The attorney can help you understand what you are entitled to according to the law so that you do not inadvertently cheat yourself during mediation. Before entering mediation, ensure that your spouse knows that you will not sign any agreements until after you have had a chance to review them with your attorney. 

Consider Your Spouse's Wants and Needs

Despite the fact that you and your spouse are divorcing, you still are far more familiar with his or her wants and needs than the mediator. As a result, you have a fair idea of what he or she would be willing to trade in exchange for things you want. 

Before attending mediation, make a list of wants and needs you know your spouse has so that you can possibly trade them for your own wants and needs. If negotiations stall, you can turn to the list to help keep the process moving forward. 

Keep Emotions Out of Negotiations

One of the biggest mistakes you can make in mediation is becoming emotional. Emotions can cloud your ability to make sound decisions. If you become particularly agitated when emotional, your spouse could choose to manipulate this to his or her advantage. 

If a suggestion during mediation upsets you, count to 10 and take a few deep breaths. If you are still upset, ask for a break. Do not make any agreements while you are upset. Although you are not signing off on them now, your spouse could view your actions in a negative light and he or she might be unwilling to negotiate in the future. 

When you meet with your family law attorney prior to mediation, he or she will go over additional tips you need to remember during your sessions.