Four Common Mistakes Parents Make With Kids During A Divorce And How To Avoid Them

Posted on: 6 June 2016

Parenting can be tough on its own, but if you are going through a divorce, this can be an even more difficult task. It is important that you think with your child's best interests at heart while bearing in mind any legal ramifications that might coming through from your divorce. Here are four common parental mistakes that can happen during a divorce and how to avoid falling into any of these traps.

1. Talking Badly About Your Spouse

If you and your spouse are separated, be the bigger person and don't talk badly about your spouse in front of your kids. This can give your kids mixed messages and make it hard for them to understand that no one is the bad guy. If your ex-spouse finds out you are stating falsehoods about their character, this can even be used against you in your divorce.

2. Fighting Over Physical Items

If you and your spouse are moving into different homes, you may hit some bumps in the road while separating out your child's personal items for each household. Try to let these issues go and start to realize there will be items that your children will now need two of at each home. This will especially be the case if custody arrangements from your divorce are headed towards joint custody.

3. Empowering Your Child Too Much

You might be exhausted and you might want your child to weigh in on some decisions surrounding their future after the divorce. Having kids try to choose which parent they would like to live with can be too much pressure, even for young teens. These types of decisions can be made thoughtfully by you and your spouse, or with a family law mediator or lawyer. Your children don't need to have the added pressure of grown-up decisions on top of a divorce.

4. Not Setting Up a Firm Visitation Schedule

If you and your spouse are still finalizing custody agreements on paper, this doesn't mean that you can't get started on a firm schedule in the interim. While your divorce outcome will dictate the final agreements for custody, you might have a good idea where decisions are headed. If you and your spouse aren't necessarily in a contentious predicament, try to set up and emulate what you think future visitation agreements will be.

Going through a divorce with kids isn't easy. It is important to keep your cool and try your best to stay level-headed around your kids and when it comes to decisions surrounding your kids. Your family law attorney can help guide you through decisions as painlessly as possible so you can focus on keeping your kid's lives as normal as possible. Visit for more information.